Nearly 30 years ago, I was promoted to senior leadership at a major PR agency. I had the title, the office, the salary, the team reporting to me.

And I wasn’t leading anyone. In the battle of leadership vs. management, I was losing!

I was managing. I was doing management exceptionally well, actually managing projects, managing budgets, managing client expectations, managing deliverables. But leading? That’s something different entirely.

The distinction matters more than you might think. Because in my coaching practice with communications executives, I see brilliant professionals stuck in the same place I was: promoted into leadership roles based on their technical excellence, but never taught what leadership actually means.

The Question Nobody Asks

Here’s the question that changed everything for me, asked by a coach when I was struggling as a “leader” 25 years ago:

“When you turn around, do you see inspired followers motivated to pursue a common vision? Or do you just see people who report to you?”

I was stunned into silence. Because the honest answer was: I had no idea.

I knew my direct reports showed up. I knew they did their work. I knew they followed my directions. But inspired? Motivated by a common vision? Choosing to follow me?

I’d never even considered that as the measure.

Leadership Is a Two-Part Choice

One of the most important frameworks I share in my presentations is this: leadership is a two-part choice.

Your conscious decision to lead. To embrace the challenge and the joy of leading people, not just managing tasks.

Their conscious decision to follow. Or not.

That second part is what most newly promoted leaders miss. They assume that because people report to them, those people are following them. But reporting and following are completely different things.

You can report to someone and do the bare minimum. Show up, check off the to-do list, collect the paycheck, go home. That’s transactional.

Following is transformational. It’s when someone is genuinely inspired by your vision, trusts your judgment, respects your leadership, and chooses, actively chooses, to go above and beyond because they believe in where you’re taking them.

That’s the difference between management and leadership.

The Litmus Test: Five Questions

If you’re wondering whether you’re actually leading, ask yourself these five questions. And be brutally honest with your answers.

1. When things go wrong, does your team come to you early, or hide problems until they’re critical?

If they’re hiding problems: You’re managing through fear or control. People don’t bring you problems because they’re afraid of your reaction, don’t trust your judgment, or know you’ll just take over anyway.

If they come to you early: You’ve created psychological safety. They trust you’ll help them solve the problem rather than blame them for having it.

A managing director I coached was frustrated that her team kept having last-minute crises. “Why don’t they tell me sooner?” she asked.

When I interviewed her team (with her permission), the answer was clear: “When we bring her problems early, she gets frustrated and takes over the project. So we try to solve it ourselves until it’s too late.”

She thought she was being helpful by jumping in. Her team experienced it as “you don’t trust us to figure this out.”

We worked on shifting her response from “here’s what to do” to “what do you think the solution is?” Within three months, early problem-flagging increased dramatically.

2. Do people on your team challenge your ideas, or just agree with everything you say?

If everyone always agrees: You’re not leading, you’re dictating. Either you’ve created an environment where disagreement feels unsafe, or you’re not actually listening when people do disagree.

If people challenge you respectfully: You’ve built trust. They believe their input matters and that you value diverse perspectives over consensus.

One of the CEOs I coach made a fascinating change: in leadership meetings, he started asking “Who disagrees with this approach?” instead of “Does everyone agree?”

The first time he asked, silence. People thought it was a trap.

The second time, one brave soul disagreed and explained why.

The CEO said, “That’s a really good point I hadn’t considered. Let’s explore that.”

Now? Every meeting has robust debate. His leadership team makes better decisions because people feel safe challenging ideas.

3. When you’re not in the room, does work stop or continue at the same quality and pace?

If work stops: You’re a bottleneck, not a leader. Your team is dependent on your direction, approval, or presence to function.

If work continues: You’ve built a culture of empowerment and clear direction. People know what success looks like and trust themselves to pursue it.

Remember that question my coach asked me 25 years ago? He followed it with: “What would happen if you weren’t available for two weeks?”

My answer: “Everything would fall apart.”

His response: “Then you’re not leading. You’re just doing at a senior level.”

That hurt. It was also true.

4. Do your best people want to grow within your team, or are they actively looking to transfer or leave?

If your best people are leaving: Something about your leadership is pushing them away. Maybe it’s lack of growth opportunities, maybe it’s your leadership style, maybe it’s that they don’t see a future worth staying for.

If your best people are staying and growing: You’re creating an environment where talented people want to be.

This is one of the clearest indicators of leadership effectiveness. High performers have options. They stay places where they’re led well. They leave places where they’re merely managed.

5. Could you articulate your team’s shared vision right now, and would your team articulate the same vision?

If you can’t articulate it (or they’d articulate it differently): You’re managing tasks, not leading toward a vision.

If you can both articulate the same vision: You’re actually leading. You’ve created shared purpose.

John C. Maxwell said, “People buy into the leader before they buy into the vision.” But they need both. Management focuses on the tasks. Leadership focuses on the vision.

Leadership Vs. Management: What’s Actually Different? 

Let me be clear: management matters. We need excellent managers. Managing projects, budgets, timelines, deliverables. This is critical work.

But leadership is different:

Management is about process. Managing projects, managing budgets, managing timetables, managing accounts. All critically important.

Leadership is about people. Specifically, it’s leading your followers to achieve organizational goals. It always gets down to people.

Management asks: Are we on time? On budget? Meeting deliverables?

Leadership asks: Are we pursuing the right vision? Are people inspired? Are we developing capabilities?

Management focuses on: Efficiency, execution, optimization.

Leadership focuses on: Direction, inspiration, development.

You need both. But if you were promoted into a leadership role and you’re only managing, you’re not fulfilling the role you were hired for.

The Consolidation Reality: Why This Matters More Than Ever

With the Omnicom-IPG consolidation eliminating more than 10,000 positions, and similar cuts across the industry, the difference between leadership and management has never mattered more.

Organizations are promoting people into leadership roles to fill gaps. Right now. Ready or not.

And here’s what drives me nuts: we’re promoting people based on their technical excellence, giving them bigger titles, and hoping they’ll figure out leadership along the way.

That’s not a strategy. That’s a setup for failure.

If you’ve been recently promoted, or if you’ve been in leadership for years but suspect you’re still mostly managing, this is your moment. The industry needs real leaders right now, not just people with leadership titles.

How to Shift from Managing to Leading

If you’ve recognized yourself in the “manager” column more than you’d like, here’s the good news: leadership can be learned. I know because I had to learn it myself.

Start asking instead of telling. When someone brings you a problem, resist the urge to solve it. Ask: “What do you think we should do?” and “What would you need to move forward?” This builds their capability instead of their dependence.

Create a vision worth following. Management coordinates tasks. Leadership paints a picture of where you’re going together. Can you articulate why your team’s work matters beyond “because the client needs it”?

Develop people, not just deliverables. Every interaction is an opportunity to develop someone’s capability. Are you using those opportunities or just getting through your to-do list?

Get feedback on your leadership. Not just once a year in a formal 360 degree feedback program, but regularly and informally. Remember, the leaders who rank in the top 10% for asking for feedback get rated at the 86th percentile in overall leadership effectiveness (Zenger/Folkman study of 50,000 executives).

Understand your energy. This is where the Energy Leadership Index becomes invaluable. Unlike personality assessments that tell you who you are, the ELI shows you how you’re showing up as a leader right now, both when things are going well and when you’re experiencing stress.

The Leadership Definition That Changed My Practice

After years of working with communications leaders, here’s my leadership definition:

Leadership is using your leadership energy and influence to get desired outcomes for your organization, team members, peers, clients, bosses, and yourself.

Notice what’s in that definition: energy and influence. Not title. Not authority. Not control.

The question isn’t “Am I leading?” It’s “How am I leading?”

Because your energy affects every single person you interact with. If you see your environment as challenging, you and your team will feel challenged. If you see uncertainty, you’ll transmit uncertainty. If you see opportunity in everything, they will too.

When it comes to energy and mindset, you get what you give. So give what you want.

The Choice You Make Every Day

Here’s the truth I share with every leader I coach: your team’s decision to follow you is a choice they make every single day.

They’re constantly evaluating: Is this person worth following?

If all you’re offering is good management, such as clear directions, organized projects, and efficient processes, they’ll show up and do their jobs. That’s transactional.

If you’re offering actual leadership, including vision, inspiration, development, and empowerment, they’ll go above and beyond. They’ll tell talented people to come work for you. That’s transformational.

Management gets compliance. Leadership earns commitment.

So when you turn around today, what do you see?

People who report to you? Or people who consciously choose to follow you?

If it’s the former, that’s okay. Now you know. And knowing is the first step to changing.

Because leadership isn’t about the title on your business card. It’s about the choice you make every day to truly lead. And the choice your team makes every day to truly follow.

If you want to understand how you’re showing up as a leader—and how to shift from managing to leading—executive coaching provides the outside perspective you can’t get on your own. The Energy Leadership Index assessment can reveal exactly where you’re stuck and how to move forward. I offer a complimentary consultation—schedule here.