A leader listening deeply to her team

Last month, an agency Senior VP shared something that’s been sitting with me ever since: “My team shows up. They do their work. But something’s off. The energy is different. They’re just going through the motions.”

She wasn’t talking about performance problems. Deliverables were getting done. Deadlines were being met. But the discretionary effort, the classic going above and beyond, the creative problem-solving, the genuine investment in the work, had vanished.

“What changed?” I asked.

Long pause. “I don’t think I’ve been very respectful lately.”

Here’s what I see happening right now in our industry: with economic uncertainty, consolidation, and layoffs across PR and communications, most people aren’t leaving their jobs. They can’t afford to. But they’re mentally and emotionally checking out.

And the difference between a team that’s present and a team that’s engaged often comes down to one thing:

respect.

Respect Isn’t Soft—It’s Strategic

Let me be direct about something: I’m not talking about respect as some touchy-feely nice-to-have. I’m talking about respect as a leadership tool that directly impacts your team’s performance, your client relationships, and your agency’s bottom line.

The data makes the case plainly. Gallup’s 2024 research found that only 31% of U.S. employees are engaged at work, the lowest level in a decade, while 17% are now actively disengaged. And here’s the direct line to respect: engaged employees are five times more likely to report feeling respected by their leaders than their disengaged peers. Five times.

Not because people are needy. Because respect signals something fundamental: “Your contributions matter. Your judgment is valued. Your dignity as a professional is non-negotiable.”

When people feel respected, they give discretionary effort. When they don’t, they give the bare minimum required to keep their jobs.

In this economy, that’s the difference you’re seeing: people showing up versus people being engaged.

Disrespect Actually Costs You

Your team isn’t leaving. But here’s what you’re losing when they don’t feel respected.

Start with the macro picture: Gallup’s 2025 State of the Global Workplace report estimates that disengagement costs the global economy $8.9 trillion annually—nearly 9% of global GDP. In 2024 alone, the productivity loss from disengaged workers reached $438 billion. These aren’t abstract numbers. They filter directly down to your agency’s capacity, quality, and culture.

At the individual level, the costs compound:

• Discretionary effort disappears. They’ll do what’s required, but they won’t go above and beyond. No staying a little late to perfect the pitch. No creative problem-solving or thinking about the next steps. No “I had an idea” conversations on Monday morning.
• Innovation stops. Why would someone suggest a bold new idea to a leader who dismisses input, overrules decisions without explanation, or publicly criticizes work? They won’t. They’ll do exactly what you tell them and nothing more.
• Client relationships suffer. Disengaged team members don’t advocate for clients the way engaged ones do. They don’t anticipate needs, don’t go the extra mile, don’t build the relationships that turn clients into long-term partners.
• Your best people start quiet quitting. They’re physically present but mentally gone. And when the economy improves? They’ll be the first ones out the door, taking all that institutional knowledge with them.
• Your reputation as a leader takes a hit. People talk. Your team tells their friends in the industry how you lead. That reputation follows you, and it affects who wants to work for you when you have openings.

And yes, some people still leave. Even in this tight job market, your highest performers have options. The truly talented communicators, the strategic thinkers, the ones with strong networks—they can and will leave if they feel disrespected.

According to the Society for Human Resource Management (SHRM), replacement costs run 50–200% of annual salary. That’s not just recruiting and onboarding. It’s lost institutional knowledge, client relationships that suffer during the transition, remaining team members absorbing extra work (and starting to look elsewhere themselves), and the hit to your reputation in the industry.

One of my clients calculated that losing just three senior people in one year cost them nearly $500,000 in replacement costs alone—not counting the client revenue lost during the transition period.

So the cost isn’t just gradual disengagement. Some of your best people will leave. And the rest will disengage. Both are expensive. And both stem from the slow erosion of respect.

The Gap Leaders Don’t See

In my coaching practice with PR and communications leaders, I see this gap constantly: leaders who genuinely believe they respect their teams, but whose teams feel disrespected every single day.

A senior VP I coached was baffled by her team’s disengagement. “I care about them. I fight for their raises. I protect them from difficult clients.”

All true. But in conversations with her team, a pattern emerged:

• She would publicly criticize work in client meetings.
• She’d ask for input, then announce her decision before the discussion ended.
• She’d overrule team decisions without explanation.
• She’d schedule meetings during people’s blocked focus time without asking.

Did she intend disrespect? Absolutely not. Did her team feel disrespected? Every single day.

This matters more than most leaders realize. Gallup’s 2025 data shows that manager engagement itself fell from 30% to 27% in 2024—and that 70% of team engagement is directly attributable to the manager. You are the single biggest variable in whether your team shows up engaged or checked out. The respect gap isn’t about bad intentions. It’s about blind spots.

What Respect Actually Looks Like in Leadership

After coaching dozens of leaders through this, here’s what I’ve learned: respect isn’t about being nice or avoiding hard conversations. It’s about how you treat people when things go wrong, when you’re under pressure, when you disagree, or when they hand in work that you believe is below their capabilities.

Respect shows up in specific, observable behaviors:

You listen more than you talk.

Research from Zenger and Folkman’s study of 50,000 executives found that leaders who genuinely listen, and not just wait for their turn to speak, are rated as significantly more effective. This finding has been consistently replicated. When people feel heard, they feel respected.

You’re consistent.

Nothing undermines respect faster than the leader who’s collaborative on Monday and dictatorial on Thursday. The one who says “we’re a team” but makes unilateral decisions. In leadership, consistency is everything. 

You explain your decisions.

You don’t need consensus for every decision. But you do need to explain your reasoning. “Here’s what I’m thinking and why” shows respect for people’s need to understand. “Because I said so” doesn’t.

You stand by your people.

Michelle Egan, PRSA’s 2023 President and Chief Communications Officer at Alyeska Pipeline Service Company, told me: “When I ask someone to take on challenges or make decisions, they will make mistakes and I’m going to stand by them. Their mistakes are my mistakes too.” That’s respect. Not protecting people from consequences, but owning the outcomes together.

You give feedback that develops, not diminishes.

One of the skills I work on with coaching clients is delivering feedback that’s equally  honest, kind, diplomatic and direct. And you check in to ask their take on things.  “In yesterday’s client meeting do you recall interrupting the client?” Then really wait for an answer.

Acknowledge their point of view. And then depending on their reply, say “I’m sure you didn’t intend it, but you interrupted the client three times.” See how they respond to that factual information.

“When that happens, the client shuts down, and they stop listening to your important points.”

Let that sink in. And rather than belabor what happened in the past, bring them into the future: “What will you do differently next time?” “How might you be on the lookout for that behavior in the future?”

That’s respectful, truly constructive feedback, not just “constructive critique.” It’s specific, focused on behavior not character, and invites collaboration on the solution. And it communicates respect.

You protect their time and energy.

Respect shows up in how you schedule meetings, how you communicate urgency, how you handle after-hours requests. Do you respect that they have lives outside work? Or do you treat their time as infinitely available?

The Current Reality: Why Respect Matters More Than Ever

With the Omnicom-IPG consolidation eliminating more than 10,000 positions and similar cuts across the industry, your team is scared.

They’re watching who gets cut and who stays. They’re wondering if loyalty matters. They’re updating their LinkedIn profiles just in case. They’re coming to work every day with anxiety running in the background.

They’re also not leaving. Because where would they go? The job market is tight. Opportunities are limited. Most people are staying put.

This creates a dangerous dynamic: captive disengagement.

People who would leave if they could, but can’t, so they stay and mentally check out. They do the minimum required. They stop caring about quality. They stop innovating. They stop going above and beyond.

And here’s what’s insidious about this moment: it’s easy to mistake presence for engagement. “Everyone’s still here, so things must be fine.”

They’re not fine. They’re just stuck.

This is exactly when respect becomes your most powerful leadership tool. Because when people feel genuinely respected, when they feel their contributions matter, their judgment is valued, their dignity is protected, they don’t just stay, they stay engaged.

They give discretionary effort even in difficult times. They remain loyal even when they’re scared. Not because they have to. Because they choose to.

How to Rebuild Respect (If You’ve Lost It)

If you’re reading this and recognizing that your team might not feel respected, here’s what to do:

Name it directly.

Don’t dance around it. In your next team meeting: “I’ve been thinking about how I’ve been showing up as a leader lately, and I’m not sure I’ve been as respectful of your time, your judgment, and your contributions as I should be. I want to change that. And I want your help.” That level of vulnerability and accountability? That’s respectful leadership.

Ask for specific feedback.

First, have some real conversations. “What are three things I do that makes you feel respected? What’s three things I do that make you feel disrespected?” Then listen. Really listen. Don’t defend. Don’t explain. Just listen and say thank you.

If you suspect your team members won’t share candid feedback face to face, consider a 360-degree feedback exercise.

Check your consistency.

Ask yourself: How do I behave when I’m stressed, behind schedule, or frustrated? That’s when your true respect, or lack of it, shows. If you’re respectful only when things are going well, you’re not actually a respectful leader.

Watch your language and tone.

Do you interrupt? Dismiss ideas without explanation? Make sarcastic comments? Use people’s mistakes as examples in meetings? These signal disrespect, even if you don’t intend them to.  

Protect boundaries publicly.

The next time someone sends a non-urgent email at 10 PM, respond the next morning: “I appreciate your dedication, but I don’t expect responses outside work hours unless it’s truly urgent.” That shows respect for everyone’s boundaries.

Stand by your people when it matters.

The next time something goes wrong in a leadership meeting, resist the urge to point fingers. Ask yourself: “How do I share responsibility for this outcome?” Then own it publicly.

What Changes When You Lead with Respect

I’ve coached enough leaders through this shift to know what happens when someone commits to respectful leadership:

Energy changes immediately. Within weeks, you’ll notice: people are more engaged in meetings. They’re offering ideas again. They’re solving problems proactively instead of waiting to be told what to do.

Trust rebuilds. People start bringing you problems early instead of hiding them. They start telling you the truth instead of what they think you want to hear.

Performance improves. Not because you’re demanding more, but because people who feel respected give more. They care about quality again. They take pride in their work.

Client relationships strengthen. Engaged teams deliver better work. They anticipate client needs. They build stronger relationships. Clients notice the difference.

Your reputation shifts. Your team starts talking about you differently. Not as “the boss I have to deal with” but as “the leader I choose to follow.”

Executive coaching consistently produces strong ROI, and a significant portion of that return comes from leaders learning to show up more respectfully and seeing the ripple effects across their entire team.

The Choice You’re Making Right Now

Here’s what I tell every leader I coach: your team’s decision to be engaged—truly engaged, not just present, is a choice they make every single day.

In this economy, they can’t choose whether to stay or leave. But they absolutely can choose whether to give discretionary effort or just do the minimum.

And a huge part of that choice comes down to respect.

Do you respect their expertise? Their time? Their contributions? Their dignity as professionals?

If the answer is yes, and you demonstrate it consistently, they’ll stay engaged. They’ll do their best work. They’ll remain loyal even through uncertainty.

If the answer is no, or if your actions don’t match your intentions, they’ll mentally check out. They’ll give you the bare minimum. And the moment the economy improves, they’ll be gone.

The good news? Respect is entirely within your control. You don’t need budget approval. You don’t need HR sign-off. You just need to decide, every single day, in every single interaction, to treat your people with the respect they deserve.

That’s leadership with a capital L. And in times like these, it’s what keeps your team engaged, loyal, and performing at their best.

If you want to understand how you’re actually showing up as a leader and where you might have respect blind spots you can’t see yourself, executive coaching provides the outside perspective that changes everything. I offer a complimentary consultation—schedule here.